Something that made me laugh today...

"The roundest thing in the Universe is called a 'Neutron Star'"

"THAT'S NOT ROUND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"No, that's a picture of a Supernova."

"THEN SHOW US THE ROUND THING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Ahahhahaha.

Oh Phil, you're hilarious!

Weather Gripes

I cannot describe the sort of unreasonable anger I feel towards people who complain about weather all year round. There are few tortures worse than having a friend who insists how 'Fucking freezing!' it is during winter, and when summer rolls around complains that it's 'Much too hot' for any human to survive in. Fuck off. Just, fuck off. I hate your kind. Pick a fucking season and stop your moaning. I want to stab you in the face every time you open your mouth. Seriously? You complain like nobody's business when it's cold and too incovenient to go and get a blanket; yet we get to the season that you 'can't wait!' for, we're STILL having to listen to your god awful moaning. Why the fuck, do you insist on inflicting your fucking temperature issues on everybody else. I know this may come as a shock to you - but Facebook was not designed to be a constant weather monitor for your personal comfort levels.

Well here's a tip from me to you. No really, listen closely; you'll want to hear this.

You're all fucking ridiculous. I'm not sure if you're aware of just how much people hate you, but trust me. If you're reading this and thinking, 'Oh no, I'm definitely and exception because I only complain about the heat at night'; I'm pretty sure someone will be around in the next ten to twelve minutes, armed with a butchers knife and ready to castrate you for your insolence. You are the same person who, I'm sure, uses 'Literally' instead of 'Figuratively' and wears Ugg Boots with Mini Skirts. You're a walking contradiction and it would be best if you were taken out of the gene pool.

No really, just fuck off.

Quotes

"The Christmas Tree is saying 'Don't worry - not everything is dead, so, probably the sun will come back.' And the Fairy ontop is saying 'Weee I'm a magic Fairy!'"

- David 'Love of my life' Mitchell

Idle nothings

You should know that you're just a temporary fix.
This is not routine with you, it don't mean that much to me.
You're just a filler in the space that happened to be free.

How dare you think you'd get away with trying to play me?

Old School 'Year in Review' Quiz.

2011 Year in Review meme

1. What did you do in 2011 that you'd never done before?



Way to start out with a hard one! Um... I moved out of home. Thats a pretty big one! Probably loads of little things as well, like try different foods etc.

2. Did you keep your New Years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

Kept two, failed on one. Perhaps, I haven't really thought about it yet.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?

No. Unfortunately!

4. Did anyone close to you die?

No. Fortunately!

5. What countries did you visit?

At the beginning of the year I travelled to the United Kingdom, United States, Canada and (technically) China

6. What would you like to have in 2012 that you lacked in 2011?

Confidence in myself.

7. What dates from 2011 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

January 1st 2011 - 14th January 2011 - My Overseas trip. I won't ever forget how amazing it was, and how lucky I was to go.

January 15th 2011 - The wedding of my family friends, Reghan and Derryn. I felt so privledged to watch them get married after growing up with Reghan, it was a wonderful day.

There are probably more memorable dates, but unfortunately they haven't quite 'etched' themselves into my brain, as I've forgotten them.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?

Surving my own mind, I think.

9. What was your biggest failure?

Inability to move past my depression and bringing down others as accidental collateral.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?

Nothing too serious.

11. What was the best thing you bought?

My very own laptop!

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?

My Dad's, for always taking the time to listen and love me despite my faults. Emily, for her constant support and unwaivering loyalty. Jessica, for cheering me up and being patient.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?

The girl in my life who consistantly fails to see beyond herself, and the woman who refuses to act with kindness.

14. Where did most of your money go?

Laptop, housing expenses.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?

Getting tweeted by David Mitchell and Sarah Millican.
Discovering my undying love for the BBC
Harry Potter exhibition & theme park

16. What song will always remind you of 2011?

Flagpole Sitta - Harvey Danger

17. Compared to this time last year, you are:

Happier or sadder? I'm not sure.

Thinner or fatter? Fatter

Richer or poorer? Asset richer, money poorer.

18. What do you wish you'd done more of?

Reading, Writing, General self betterment.

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?

Eating, Feeling sad.

20. How will you be spending Christmas?

It was spent in Sydney with my family.

21. What was the most embarrassing thing that happened to you in 2011?

I can't actually remember. Probably something highly embarassing that I'm blocking out for good reason!

22. Did you fall in love in 2011

Unrequited love!

23. How many one-night stands?

0

24. What were your favorite TV programmes?

QI, Would I Lie to You, Big Fat Quiz of the Year, Bleak Old Shop of Stuff, Glee, That Mitchell and Webb Look, Graham Norton Show.

25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?

I wouldn't say hate. Pity and dislike? Absolutely.

26. What was the best book you read?

The Hours - Michael Cunningham

27. What was your greatest musical discovery?

The beauty and inspiration that is, 'Everybody's free (to wear sunscreen) - Baz Luhrmann. (Thank you, Jessica)

28. What did you want and get?

Good grades.

29. What did you want and not get?

A higher level of intelligence.

31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?

I turned 22 years old on the 30th of April 2011. I spent the day with my immediate family, and the evening with my friends at dinner.

32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

The ability to stand up for myself.

33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2011?

I would describe it as being a way of hiding from the world. Camouflage, as such.

34. What kept you sane?

British Television and Emily.

35. Which celebrity / public figure did you fancy the most?

David Mitchell, without competiton.

36. What political issue stirred you the most?

The intentional lack of reform to the Marriage Act to include homosexual marriages.

37. Who did you miss?

My Grandmother, My Dog.

38. Who was the best new person you met?

Tania and her family.

39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2011.

To not burden my friends and family so much. To not hate as much.

40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year
'Sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind. The race is long, and in the end, its only with yourself.'

An Open Letter to Julia Gillard

Hello, Julia.

How are you today? I thought that you would appreciate a letter from a patriotic Australian 22 year old girl, who would love the phrase Australian's can have 'A Fair Go' to apply to ALL Australians, instead of just those you like.

I should first start off by congratulating you on being 'elected' the first female Prime Minister of Australia. No, really. Well done. With a back handed stab and a minority government, you can surely say that you, madam, were the countrys first choice! When I first saw you as Kevin Rudd's deputy, I turned to my mother and said, "Well, you are looking at our first female Prime Minister." You can take this as a compliment, if you wish, but I assure you - it wasn't meant as one. I always enjoy seeing ambitious snakes-in-the-grass rising to the top, trampling on others as they climb the ladder mercilessly.But luckily, this time - I got to watch someone do it in heels! Amazing. So thank you for taking that title from someone deserving and desired by the country, I really appreciated it. I'd hate to have thought that we would see democratically elected progress in this country. So thank goodness you saved us from that!

So I've been sitting here wondering (and please,Julia, if I have any of this wrong, please respond and correct me.) why on earth someone who wouldn't have been able to have their position in power 50 years ago, is so against change that prohibits discrimination? I mean, surely this makes little sense to you, Julia? What would you be doing with your life? Perhaps trying to climb the corporate ladder in those famous soul crushing heels of yours? Perhaps you'd be imposing your archaic views on school children? Well, lucky for you, Julia, this happens to be irrelevant. Luckily for you, someone stood up and said "Heck yes women should be allowed to vote. Better yet, they should be allowed to campaign!" Hooray! One step closer to being a free country! Oh, and then, someone decided that perhaps it wasn't appropriate to rape women, even if they were legally married to them - Hooray! Even more change! And Julia, perhaps you might have noticed, but this law change even occurred about marriage! Isn't that incredible? Someone changing an archaic law about marriage rules and the world didn't implode? Don't worry, Julia. I'm as shocked as you are.

I would hate to think what your opinions would be, if this change to the marriage act was propositioned about interracial marriages. Would you be so quick to dismiss change to this Marriage Act you seem so certain is fine as it is? What if it banned a black man and white woman marrying, Julia? Are you also against that change? For someone who is all for 'A Fair Go', you seem to be limiting this 'fair go' list pretty quickly. Almost as quickly as fundamentalist Christians who believe that God loves all his earthly children... Oh yeah, except; gays, people with different religions, ethnic minorities, people who wear purple t-shirts on a Sunday... perhaps you guys should get together and create some 'My way or the Highway' style t-shirts and parade around the streets of Australia imprisoning people for not conforming to your views. Sound like fun? I thought it might!

So thank you, Julia. Thank you for making me ashamed of my country. Thank you for making us look so foolish to other countries. Thank you too, for being a follower instead of a leader (Did Barack Obama enjoy his visit with his shadow?).

And most of all, Julia. Thank you for reminding me that I still live in a country where the rights of two people getting married is subject to their genders being appropriately assigned.

I don't know about you, Julia. But I sure hope that one day I'll think back on you as the first Female Prime Minster who wasn't a total dipshit - but instead a woman who honestly did some good for Australia and made this country a better place, by allowing men and women to choose the PERSON, they would like to marry.

Ahahhaa, I know, I know. Call me a dreamer.

Good luck to the Bulldogs next year; no doubt I'll be seeing you waste your days at the football again instead of running this country,



Yours Sincerely,


Janelle
Aged 22

16th

Tired Tired Tired.

Gotta drive into town.

But tired, tired, tired.